D = Dependence
Becoming a single parent was a harsh wake up call on how dependent I had become on D. On many different levels: financial stability, emotional stability, an extra set of hands to help with Ty or housework, the muscle necessary when things are too heavy or a project was too overwhelming, the knowledge that he has (and I lack!) about cars and how house stuff works, etc. The list goes on. Once our relationship and communication started falling apart, I quickly realized that I had allowed myself to become dependent on what he offered in just being around. This has led me to a place where I feel like I have to start taking some of that dependence back and learn how to depend only on myself. Of course, this makes me feel as if I'm shutting myself off from ever being able to open up and allow anyone to offer me anything in the future. But, for the time being, I recognize that I need to learn how to depend on myself, and only myself, for the things that need to get done.