Wednesday, February 29, 2012

The first year and a half. . .

Welcome back. . .if you've missed the first part of the relationship story, go read about it here

So, we woke up together on Saturday morning and I immediately became uncomfortable.  Not so much embarassed (after all, we were both fully clothed!), just uncomfortable.  I was alone in my apartment with this guy who I had just met less than 24 hours earlier.  And I had just spent a night cuddled up to him on the floor of my apartment.  So, in true me fashion, I kicked him out.  I wasn't rude about it, but I didn't really leave any room for debate.  I told him that I was supposed to go help a friend with a party that she was throwing (I left out the minor little detail about the party not actually starting until about 8pm that night--like I said, minor details.) and that I most certainly was not going to leave him alone in my apartment.  After all, we had just met.  So, I packed him up and sent him on his way.  A three hour drive home. 

Throughout the next couple of days, I didn't really talk to him too much.  However, on Tuesday night, I got a call from him on my cell.  He asked if he could come back to my town and see me.  I said that would be okay (I guess he was kinda starting to grow on me) and asked him when he'd like to come back.  He said the next day.  I asked him if he was crazy.  That was a Wednesday night and he clearly didn't understand the concept of being an adult and having a j-o-b.  But, he said that he had a friend of his from out of state who was coming in town and he wanted his friend to meet me.  I was kind of flattered at this so I agreed to let him come back into town.  This, of course, meant that he AND his friend were going to have to stay with me in my tiny one bedroom apartment.  I made sure that he understood that meant that he and his friend would be sharing my tiny little couch if they were going to crash at my place.  He said that he would sleep on the couch and he would bring an air mattress for his friend. I agreed on the condition that my best friend could also come and stay with me (I didn't fully trust this dude yet. . .and I was a little nervous around him).  Again, my friend obliged but she had her own conditions this time: no shots of rum.  I sheepishly agreed to her terms and muttered another apology.  She's a good friend. 

So, D. and his friend traveled the three hours down to see me the very next day.  We all went out that night and had a great time but I needed to be home at a relatively early hour so that I could get up and go to work the next day.  The next morning, I got up and headed off to work and at the same time, D. and his friend packed up and left my apartment.  They said they were going to grab some breakfast at IHOP before they headed out of town.  About two hours later I got a call at my office.  It was D. asking if he and his friend could stay one more night.  Ummm. . .okay?  At the time, D. said that he and his friend had really had fun the night prior and that his friend had taken a liking to my friend.  So, his friend was asking if they could stay and hang out one more night.  I later found out (about a year later) from said friend that this was a total lie.  D. had pretty much strong armed him over breakfast into agreeing to stay one more night.  It was D. that hadn't wanted to leave, not his friend.  This time it was just the three of us that hung out (my girlfriend had to work that night) but we, again, had a great time.  Friday morning, they left (they had not choice this time, D's friend had a flight to catch three hours away!) and I headed off to work. 

Throughout the next week, we talked daily.  Nothing major. . just chit chat about our day and the normal getting to know you on the surface stuff.  The following Wednesday I got an instant message from him at work.  He said that he wanted to see me again.  That night.  I was starting to think that this guy was obviously crazy but I was also really flattered.  It had been a long time since I had felt this kind of attention from someone.  Then again, it was Wednesday.  The middle of the work week.  And we lived three hours away from each other.  This was craziness!  I asked him exactly how he planned on us seeing each other--that night--and both of us still getting to work on time the next morning.  Since we both got off that night at 8pm, it wasn't really feasible for either of us to drive three hours just to spend a couple of waking hours together and then turn around and hop back into a car early the next morning so that we could be at work on time.  He suggested that we meet half way.  HUH?  He said that he had already called a hotel in a town that was roughly half way in between his town and mine and they had a reservation pending for him.  All he had to do was call back and confirm it.  "This dude is nuts", I thought.  If it had been anyone else, I wouldn't have even considered it.  But, he was my boss' best friend and I trusted my boss.  After confirming with him that this guy wasn't going to a) kill me or b) try to take advantage of me in the hotel room, I agreed to meet D. halfway.  After I got off work, I headed north to meet him at the hotel.  After driving for about an hour and a half, I was nearing the location so I called him to see how far away he was.  He was already there and said he had been for about half an hour.  I questioned him on how he could get there so quickly if we had both gotten off work at the same time.  He replied that he was excited to see me so he had driven fast.  He gave me the room number and said he couldn't wait to see me. 

When I got to our room, I was a little surprised to see that it had two double beds.  He explained that he thought that I would be more comfortable with the option to have my own bed so he had specifically requested two beds.  Now, THAT actually made my heart melt a little.  I know my parents probably won't believe this when they read it, but it's the truth: our first time spending the night together in the same room and we slept in seperate beds.  We stayed up that night talking until probably 2 a.m. and then both went to sleep in our own seperate beds.  Next morning, we headed off in seperate directions.  I think I smiled the entire way home.  It was just so nice to spend time with someone who was funny, sweet, and wasn't pressuring me into anything that I wasn't ready for.  That day at work, he called me and asked me if I would come up to see him in his town that weekend.  I (excitedly) agreed. 

After that, pretty much every weekend was the same for the next year and a half.  I would travel three hours north to see him or he would travel three hours sorth to see me.  Occasionally (about once or twice a month for the first few months) we would meet up half way in the middle of the week so that we could see each other.  Other than our weekends together, we would talk on the phone but that was about it.  Our weekends consisted of hanging out, working on his newly built house, partying with his friends, trying new restaurants, and traveling.  Due to the fact that we both made great money at the time, we were able to afford some very nice vacations together: went to Vegas, snowmobiled in Wyoming, rented a cabin in the mountains of Tennessee, went boating during the summers, etc.  It was so much fun. 

I was in love.  Head over heels for this guy, in love.  As far as I was concerned, he treated me well.  He wasn't the most romantic guy that I had ever met, and he certainly wasn't forthcoming in sharing personal details about himself or his past, but he was easy to get along with and oh-so-charming.  He was kind to me and seemed very proud to call me his girlfriend.  Whenever we would go out with his friends, I was always right there beside him and he never made any attempts to downplay our relationship or how he felt about me in public.  To our friends, everything seemed perfect.  To me, at the time, everything was perfect. 

Due to the fact that we spent only weekends together during the first year and a half of our relationship, we never really had much time to have any issues.  There would be the occasional spat every now and again but I don't really remember there ever being anything major.  Then again, as I would figure out later, it's hard to truly get to know someone when you've only spent a few days consecutive days with them at any given time.  I remained in my town with my job and he remained in his town with his job.  We were both very career oriented and weren't sure how we were going to make it work in the future (with the distance between us) but we weren't stressing too much about that at the time.  We were happy just living in the moment and enjoying the time that we did have to spend together on the weekends. 

Up until this point, the D. that I knew was funny, charming, outgoing, and instantly friends with anyone that he met.  That was the only side of him that I had ever seen.


  1. Oh the baby daddy stories, sigh;). I would like to write a fictional piece called, "baby daddy fell down a well", but that wouldn't be nice of me would it?

    Looks like you might be new to blogging? It can be a very cathartic experience, as well as connect you to a great community. I will add you under my single parent tab with other single parent bloggers! Looking forward to reading more from you;)

    1. Or, I could browse your blog first and see that you have TWO! Okay, ignore the new to blogging junk up there, but I meant that daddy in the well thing.

    2. LOL. . Thanks, Cari! :) Admittedly, I AM kind of new to the whole blogging thing. Even though my other blog was started back in July of 2011, I'm really just learning as I go!

      As far as the Daddy in the well thing, I totally feel you on that! Trust me, I have a whole host of "stories" in my head that I sometimes replay just to get me through a particularly tough day. Some of them actually start out as "Tragically (or not so), one day, BD was hit by a bus/monster truck/train/my fist. . ." Is that bad?? If so, we can both live in the "Evil Ex" sanctuary together! :-)

  2. Stopping by to welcome you on board the A to Z Challenge April 2012
    We shall have loads of fun exchanging comments and visits!

    Twitter: @AprilA2Z

  3. Okay, I'm hooked. Then what happened? Did turn into a zombie, werewolf or vampire??? :)

    Glad I found you via A to Z. #858 :)